A Song Across the Hall

Very little rouses me to write these days.

But you have.

Thank you, R.

For the Spanish and the guitar, the fearlessness and faith. 

We're strangers, but love lets us know each other.

I wish your songs could carry beyond the hall.

I think you could save the world with them.

And I hope you find her.

I hope you find her.

"Why are we here?"

Falling in love with you is rather more like leaping than falling.

That is to say, it was wanted.

(But you have this way about you.)

Being next to you is rather more like being granted rest before being used than resting.

That is to say, I don't ever feel I'm in control.

(But I have this way about me.)

Happiness is rather more like a surrender of want than wanting happiness.

That is to say, I love you.

(And I love this way about us.)

Perhaps

Perhaps you should have ended your sentence with

!

or even just

.

But you ended it with perhaps.

And now, Lover,

you can change your perhaps to a No.

As in No, we aren't together.

Or, No, she isn't mine.

Because I'm not anymore.

"The girl next door."

"The sweet girl."

Now she's a scorned girl next door with a sweet rage.

Perhaps you should never have started that sentence at all.

"Sleep."

For beds and the blankets of hope they hold.

And glowbugs and bright moons and far away lights

to guide.

For last-try water and first-star wishes, kisses

from fathers only for daughters;

This is a lullaby.


Sleep sweet deep and loved.

My heart sings dreams and I will

never lose,

never leave,

never go.

Always know:

I'm yours.

A Passing Glance

I'm really only writing to end the quiet. I have something to say to all of you, but not the desire to say it.

So strange!

It's been a marvelous roll of weeks tumbling on. Though not with you.

I'm distant, silent, quiet, bored. Standoffish, rude and impatient.

It's possible you'll never be me or him or us and I hear my heart thinking less and less about you.. . .. ... I feel guilty and sad... ... ... . . . and I try and stare and think of a way to change....... . . but I know it won't ever.

It will always be this or less.

No matter who I am, you will be who you are.

I've never been good for many and often only for one.

(I have been chastised so many times for this!)

At the risk of loneliness or reward of solitude, this is the way I've lived my life.

Whatever it is you like in me, it always amazes me that it's enough.

Cut my heart out (with a spoon).

You've a good eye for patterns.

Thank you for looking them over again.

Here you go!

I'll tell you how. It's very easy to do.

Okay!

When am I to come over?

Thanks!

Do you have an eye dropper?

We should be lucky to all disappear so softly.

Your idea was both acute and shrewd.

You're a such a hard worker.

The lemons look fabulous!

You did a great job scanning it.

You don't have to be anything more special than the special you are.

Valkyrie

I'm going to put duct tape (decorated with a heart sticker) over my heart and stand in a field of shoulder-high grass.

Ready;

Aim;

Fire!

But that would be silly.

(And how my empty chest shudders as I laugh!)

I never had a heart at all.

You, on the other hand, you are life and beating and blood.

One by one my saw-tooth-edged arrows fly.

Miss you, I will not.